I used to think no guy could possibly get it (self.NoFap)

{NoFap}

63 ups - 15 downs = 48 votes

NoFap has taught me a lot of things. Before, I used to think that 90 percent of men had a one-track mind. If you'd have told me that some guys truly make an effort to fight their urges, I would've laughed, bitterly. Because I wouldn't have believed you, not for a second.

When I discovered NoFap, I rediscovered my faith in humanity. I read all these stories of guys who'd come to realize how destructive PMO really is. How the media mutilate reality in an effort to make us believe that 'we want that'. That, being an unhealthy, degrading and unreal perception of relations and sexuality. I read tons of posts of guys who Got it. This made me incredibly happy, but it also made me sad.

I've come to see men and their social behaviour in a new light. I no longer see 'macho', 'awkward', 'clumsy', 'clown', but I see guys who may or may not struggle with porn addiction and a warped perception. Once I discovered your posts and came to realize the very painful consequences of PMO, I felt defeated, because how many guys actually get the chance to a) discover the truth and b) reset and start anew? Too few, that's for sure. I see NoFap as the very best training you can get as you're preparing for a future relationship or marriage. How many of the guys out there have to live life unprepared, without even being conscious of the thing that's ruining their chances?

As a woman, there is little I can do to reach out to the men in my environment. I can be kind and set a good example, not behave in a provoking manner and show there is great value in friendship and good conversation. That's about it, I think. It's not enough, but it is something.

Please reach out to your fellow men and share the happiness and freedom of a life without deception.

24 comments submitted at 23:22:36 on Mar 8, 2014 by Kamaman

  • [-]
  • n0-fap-n00b
  • 1 Points
  • 00:10:49, 9 March

> Before, I used to think that 90 percent of men had a one-track mind. If you'd have told me that some guys truly make an effort to fight their urges, I would've laughed, bitterly. Because I wouldn't have believed you, not for a second.

Unfortunately, I have discussed this with friends, and it became apparent to me that just about all of them masturbate and they all ridicule me because I don't. I have come to believe that only a very small part of the population (< 1%) is doing what you said which is fighting their urges and becoming a better person.

  • [-]
  • GmbHLaw
  • 1 Points
  • 00:54:53, 9 March

This! I've told a couple people, and I've gotten 'you've joined a cult', 'umm...ok', and lots of giggles. I really think most people are well conditioned to think it's perfectly normal to love porn

  • [-]
  • tyrannosaurusrexxxxx
  • 1 Points
  • 02:22:51, 9 March

I tell my friends and they are astounded and tell me I'm doing something they can't. You guys need new friends.

  • [-]
  • GmbHLaw
  • 1 Points
  • 02:26:19, 9 March

Haha, ain't that the truth?

  • [-]
  • strongnweak
  • 1 Points
  • 01:02:37, 9 March

Nice posts guys.

  • [-]
  • Osama_bin_loaded
  • 1 Points
  • 01:43:37, 9 March

Well, you're only considering the male population of the highly sexualized modern culture.

  • [-]
  • Osama_bin_loaded
  • 1 Points
  • 02:00:20, 9 March

Western*

  • [-]
  • nicknamer
  • 8 Points
  • 23:36:14, 8 March

This really resonates with me, because I've been reflecting a lot on how PMO has "wrecked" a generation of men (or should we call ourselves boys instead?), and it really is a great plague. I'm surrounded by couples who break down because the guys have not yet become men.

I share and understand your sadness; but I think nofap is a brutally powerful beacon of light, surging across the plains, tearing up the dark nether world we find ourselves in.

  • [-]
  • fb93
  • 1 Points
  • 00:18:39, 9 March

yeah. i do feel like a boy, actually. even with a year and a half of commitment to attempting nofap

  • [-]
  • nicknamer
  • 1 Points
  • 00:21:10, 9 March

My brother... boys don't feel like boys. Boys are foolish enough to think they are men. If you feel like a boy, it means you have begun conquering yourself. You are fighting, toiling, earning your stripes. You are, indeed, a Man.

  • [-]
  • fb93
  • 1 Points
  • 00:38:20, 9 March

Yeah well I just don't like to bullshit myself. I'm brutally honest in self-reflection. thanks, though. I just gotta bring out the MAN thats in me.

  • [-]
  • ChingGooCha
  • 1 Points
  • 01:14:54, 9 March

Goddammit i love that last sentence. I wish i wrote like that in my poems

  • [-]
  • Kamaman
  • 2 Points
  • 23:39:18, 8 March

Your poetic qualities fill my heart with courage and motivation:)

  • [-]
  • vintagenovelty
  • 1 Points
  • 00:24:14, 9 March

Yah I totally get that. I had a serious wake up call when I learned how 14 year girls are dressed and dolled up to look like they're 18 and how too many girls are actually forced or pressured into porn. Not to mention the way it fucks up your brain. I'm almost a month in without it and I already notice my memory and focus being better. I find comfort in these words, "Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things (Philippians 4:8)."

  • [-]
  • strongnweak
  • 1 Points
  • 01:03:50, 9 March

I agree, and thank God.

  • [-]
  • easttxguy
  • 3 Points
  • 23:35:53, 8 March

Good post, been working on it.

  • [-]
  • strongnweak
  • 1 Points
  • 00:59:43, 9 March

I have spoken to some of my (male) friends. They do get it, yet they are not pursuing NoFAP though. For me, it has completely changed my life. I am grateful and humble each day to become a better man. I still experience much grief and anger at myself for "creating demand" for an activity that leads to sex-trafficking, humility, and incredibly destructive behavior towards women. I am personally very sorry to you for creating this demand.

I am 43 years old and am so grateful to tell you this.

I have had a 200-day streak and now am on day 97-days.

  • [-]
  • prunedaisy
  • 1 Points
  • 01:55:59, 9 March

I want to reach out and give you a huge hug! I have been meaning to post something similar but you put it much more eloquently than I ever would. I am not a man but I believe that pornography bleeding into culture has effected even just me an immense amount. It has definitely mutilated my reality into believing that only certain things are attractive to me and the rest of the world. It's made me turn myself into an object and really confused me when it comes to sexuality in general. And I don't even fap regularly, so I cannot imagine how hard it must be for people who use pornography as a way to get off.

The people on this subreddit have all definitely helped me see that it's not just me struggling, we're all in it together. It excites me that such a large group of people see what I see and are here to educate me (having actually been through more problems themselves, most likely.)

  • [-]
  • robaustintx
  • 1 Points
  • 00:37:40, 9 March

Yes Ma'am...so much truth and wisdom. A rare combination indeed.

Thank you for the nice words. Take care.

  • [-]
  • noaf_app
  • 1 Points
  • 02:11:13, 9 March

You could go out with one of us?

  • [-]
  • still_lyfe
  • 1 Points
  • 02:11:45, 9 March

Last man I told said "Hmmm.....I like it....." and changed the subject as fast as he could.

  • [-]
  • Comeatmebro99
  • 1 Points
  • 02:36:01, 9 March

Cool post

  • [-]
  • Changenotchanges
  • 1 Points
  • 01:12:00, 9 March

I see NoFap as the very best training you can get as you're preparing for a future relationship or marriage. How many of the guys out there have to live life unprepared, without even being conscious of the thing that's ruining their chances?


Ruining my "chances"? The relationship is not the prize. Remember that a LOT of guys who go "sober" still see women as higher powers (gods). As such, the "preparation" you speak of is for codependency (the foundation of addiction). There is a ton of good in going through a process which removes a substance or activity that medicates the pain of self. Additionally, you'll notice that 99% of the members are male. That's because men are naturally object driven sexually. There is a HUGE danger in men seeing themselves as "better" if they repress that. The problem is compulsion. The part of men wanting to fuck lots of girls and seek variety is another matter entirely. That is healthy. Compulsion isn't that...compulsion isn't even sexual. In any case, the amount of men dealing with the real issue of addiction (codependency) is a minority. What we have here is a start...something. But it is very very inadequate and avoids the root of the issue...as you have here.

  • [-]
  • Changenotchanges
  • 1 Points
  • 01:14:22, 9 March

how many guys actually get the chance to a) discover the truth and b) reset and start anew?


Addiction recovery (assuming a guy is actually an addict) does NOT work that way. This is why you see crops of new guys here and the majority just dropping off the radar. What you are saying here is false.