Let me describe the exact two seconds I like about sex and see if reddit has any advice about liking the rest. (self.sex)
28 ups - 0 downs = 28 votes
I enjoy sex for two seconds, literally. When my husband pushes himself into me and then his stroke out. After that all my wetness has sufficiently lubed me up and I don't feel him inside of me anymore. Positions meant for maximum penetration don't help me feel him more. Positions meant for less penetration cause him to fall out of me completely.
Potentially I could enjoy grinding against him, but I'm not really turned on or attracted to my husband so it is a lot of work to just close my eyes and concentrate on just the vaginal sensations and if he makes a sound, or moves, or messes up the rhythm (easy to do because this takes a long time, he has to be on top or it doesn't feel good to me) I just get turned off.
I hate foreplay and don't know how to tell him to touch me better because if I fantasize about another person (not a real person, a hypothetical one) I would enjoy the things he does. I've enjoyed lots of sexual experiences in previous relationships and foreplay stuff and I can't pinpoint anything my husband does differently. I'm just don't desire him.
I'm pretty sure this is my problem, because if I listed all the things that turn me off about my husband they would look silly and like he could never make me happy. And some things he can't really change like I hate that he wears brief underwear and for a bit he tried boxer briefs but those weren't a good look either and I'm just conditioned I guess to prefer boxers, but he isn't comfortable in them. When I see the underwear on the floor, on him, in our laundry, in a new package in a shopping bag I want to vomit and physically recoil. I can't stand the sound of him breathing close to me or feeling breath on me. He carries extra weight in his chest and has moobs, I don't like his smell even when he has just showered with soap I purchased. (we both smoked a pack a day when we met ) The list goes on and on.
This is the sex potion of my issue about not being attracted to my husband and is a quasi-cross post from here http://redd.it/2a28w2 .
120 comments submitted at 19:21:56 on Jul 7, 2014 by YellowGarden